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Dr. Val Farmer | ||
| Rural Mental Health & Family Relationships | |||
7. AffairsLoginArticlesTen Lessons From Clinton's Sorry Show (August 1998)
I am disappointed. At the time I am writing this, it is in the immediate aftermath of Clinton’s admission that he had an inappropriate relationship with a former White House intern. President Clinton has performed a service for our country, albeit a negative one, of being an example of what not to do. He has given our country a great lesson in sex education and integrity. Parents and children have been forced to discuss his behavior and what it means. We have gained ten le ... Why Affairs Have To Be Confessed (August 1998)
Romance is an escape from reality. Marriage is about reality, the reality of two imperfect, incomplete people blending two sets of traditions into a compatible whole. Marriage is about a promise solemnly made by you and sanctioned by God. You promise that you will remain together, be faithful to one another and work through whatever difficulties life and differences present. Relationships are built on trust. Honesty precedes trust. Trust precedes intimacy. An affair creates a s ... Affair Partner Wonders What Will Come Next (September 1998)
Dear Dr. Farmer, I am a married mother in my mid-thirties. I have been having an affair with another married man for seven years. Over time this relationship has grown . . . We are both emotionally involved. This situation is not ideal and I wouldn't wish it on anyone! This man and I both love each other very much. I am afraid that my emotional tie to him will consume my life. My question for you is this. Is it possible for the two of us to continue this without ch ... Why Do Men And Women Have Affairs? (July 1995)
Francesca in the movie "Bridges of Madison County" was vulnerable to an affair. Her emotional needs were not being met or even addressed. Romance was suffocated in a life of duty and details. Then opportunity came to her door. An outsi Putting An Affair In The Past (March 1995)
How does a couple navigate through the turbulence of hurt and anger after an affair has been discovered? How can an affair be put in the past? Step one: No third party. Unless the third party is physically and em How To Tell If A Spouse Has Been Unfaithful (October 1995)
At least a quarter of women and a third of men are romantically and/or sexually unfaithful to their marriage partners. Those are the minimum statistics on extra-marital affairs gathered by researchers. Reality is higher. Infidelity is built on l There Is No Such Thing As An Accidental Affair (July 1999)
This article desribes some of the ways ordinarily honorable and decent people get caught up in affairs. The causes are known and affairs are preventable. Cultural and media influences are also examined. Marital problems are often a rationalization for an affair. True prevention lies in personal qualities such as honor, loyalty and honesty. How To Forgive An Affair (July 2000)
This column details the process by which betrayed partners can learn to trust and forgive a truly repentant partner. The Truth Is Hard To Tell (July 2000)
This article describes research around how and when people tell lies and for what reasons. Loyalty Is A Test Of Love (October 2000)
This article explains how loyalty is the main issue in being faithful in marriage. Feelings can wax and wane depending on circumstances. We can love more than one person at a time but we can't be loyal to both. |
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